On Being a Fianceé

I like to think I’m okay at this. Let me tell you some short stories about engaged life.

The Proposal

I didn’t know he was going to ask me on December 1st, 2018. I knew I was hungry, and galavanting onto the seawall at Children’s Pool in La Jolla was not my first choice in activity. But we walked to the end, he handed off his phone to a stranger for photos, and then he managed not to drop the ring into the sea and asked if I wanted to be his wife. Of course, I said yes.

What I didn’t do was clasp my hands over my mouth and say, “Oh my God!!” What I did do was hold my purse awkwardly and wonder, “What do I do with my hands?”

All of our engagement photos prominently feature a big, teal bag, consequently. Oh well. I wasn’t about to let it get swept off to sea by a freak wave.

The Party

“How did you choose your wedding date?”

We worked around peak salmon season and my busy season. We also did not choose winter because I don’t particularly care for the cold. We also eliminated the times of year where Daly travels for seafood expos.

That left us approximately two weekends to choose from in March and April, and one of them was Easter, so… there you go.

Venue hunting was just as methodical. We researched a number of venues in Seattle, Chelan, and Leavenworth. We contacted many of them and started to set our tour plans.

Ultimately, we toured two, one of which was experiencing a power outage, and the other which was simply exactly what we wanted.

The Expo

Here are the take-aways from the bridal expo:

  • Free donuts
  • Free cake
  • Some good deals if you’re ready — we got our DJ and MC signed that day
  • A relentless set of follow-up phone calls from some tour company that seems just a bit off

I will 100% go back for more donuts next January.

The Dress

I found my dress at a sample sale. I almost didn’t go–it was early, I had no gas in my car, and the shop was in Seattle proper. But I did go, and I was bride #13 in line to try on dresses. I grabbed three or four dresses off the racks, only paying attention to material and sparkle–not really much else.

I made some light conversation with the woman in line ahead of me; she was there only with her future father-in-law. I was there by myself, and we chatted about all things wedding. When it was her turn, she asked if I wanted to try on dresses with her, since the line was long and our respective parties were small.

Dress #2 was it, her FIL agreed, she agreed, the attendant agreed, the shop agreed, I agreed.

Cha-ching.

Side note: He doesn’t have a suit yet, and my dress is too long and will cost my first-born and a bag of chips to alter, but it’s all going to work out.

The Weight

Currently walking around at 60kg with a broken hand. I’d like to cut weight to 56-57kg once my hand is healed properly.

Why 56-57kg?

  1. That puts me comfortably in the 59kg weight class, and within a water cut of the 55kg weight class.
  2. Weightlifting is priority here.
  3. The camera definitely likes to add weight to my face.

I have it on my checklist to cut from November through end of January. Doable.

In the meantime, I’m seeing how many shrimp chips is too many.

Other Stuff

We are more than halfway through our 16-month engagement, and we’ve got a good deal of the foundation in place, which feels good.

r/weddingplanning has been my forum of choice, and it’s been helpful to get other perspectives and advice throughout.

All in all, even though I play it down a bit, I’m very much looking forward to our wedding day and our marriage.

Oh! I nearly forgot…

Chivari Chairs and Shoes

I’ve only had slight meltdowns over these two things.

Chivari chairs: I spent at least two hours researching how much those buggers cost before I remembered that I literally can’t recall a single chair I’ve ever sat in at a wedding reception. The money we save on chairs will go to a photo booth, you’re so very welcome.

Shoes: I bought a pair of gold heels, then decided to get gold wedges instead but also keep the heels because they were cute. I revisited the shoes months later and realized they are actually way smaller than I had convinced myself, and thus, worthless. So down another rabbit hole I went, until I found a pair of lace heel booties. I had to order them in a half-size bigger than normal, but I guess they run small, so what do you know–they actually fit me.

Now comes the part where I buy all the gel inserts to doctor them up.

Anyway, like I was saying, very much looking forward to it all, even though I’m going to be doubting my choice to forgo the Chivari chairs.

*shakes fist*

Okay, friends. Good night.

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Hello, Old Friend.

IT LIVES.

 

In fact, it’s doing quite well.

I’m not sure what this block editor is all about, but hey, it’s been almost two years between posts, so why not try it out?

I’m stopping by because I have a lot on my mind lately and needed to write something down:

  • We bought a house and finally get keys today after a sixty-day rent-back period by the sellers.
  • It’s gray and rainy out.
  • Weightlifting is still fun but I need to do more cardio for my hEaRt HeALtH
  • What kind of snacks do brides pack on their wedding day? (We’re engaged and getting married in April, and there’s just a lot that I don’t know about throwing a wedding.)

Today, I’m mostly wondering about snacks. I guess I should think about bringing along some Epic Bars and Hi-Chews, some sparkling water, maybe some Cheez-Its.

Either way, I bought a tote bag that says “Bride” on it, so of course my inclination is to fill it with snacks. More to come…

The Art of Going to Weddings With Friends

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I spent the last two Saturdays celebrating love. I did so with some of my best friends from different circles and walks of life. Both weddings would have been less fun for me if I had gone with a new romantic partner. There was, first of all, no pressure. There was no pressure in having friends judge either one of us. There was no pressure of expectations. No pressure to hang around and make sure my date wasn’t totally appalled by the craziness of my friends.

No, instead, there were semi-choreographed dances. Lots of semi-choreographed dances. There were great conversations. There were moments to reconnect.

And that, folks, is how you do wedding season #bestsummerever style.

That’s all for tonight.

Dec. 9th

Prompt: Party. What social gathering rocked your socks off in 2010? Describe the people, music, food, drink, clothes, shenanigans.

I went to a ton of weddings this year. I can tell you that T’s wedding, all-around, was full of shenanigans (mini bottles!) and good food (pulled pork sandwiches). It had great people, as well. Vballer’s wedding in August had an amazing dance party, as well– I even reused Fiction & Sanity’s bridesmaid dress and rocked it with my… diva heels. And the wedding I attended with Super Ninja was by far the best time I’ve had as a “plus one” to a wedding. There was free wine, swing dancing, delicious cod, and lots of fun– when I remember “us,” I want to remember that.

So yeah, the weddings– all six of them– were amazing. I know I only highlighted three, but trust me, they were all great.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to go pretty up so I can go celebrate the end of my first term of grad school

ACK!

Sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry!

I’m a bit swamped this week. I’m trying to get all my reading and assignments done for next week really quickly. I’ll be in Seattle for a wedding all weekend, and I’d really like to not spend my time on homework when I could be getting some quality “me” and friend time.

Expect sporadic entries all week.

Also, I’m thinking of doing a two-week graduate study abroad course in Rome during this coming July. Details to come.

We All Married the Wrong Person (via Marriage Gems)

An interesting read for all, whether married or still on the search for “the one.” Again, it gives some good perspectives and echoes some feelings I have about relationships in this day and age. (One of those sentiments being that communication and determination play a huge part in making relationships not only work, but last.)

We All Married the Wrong Person Couples in crisis often reach the point where they decide they are just two poorly matched people. This precedes the decision to leave the relationship and go in search of that “right person.” Unfortunately, the odds of a successful marriage go down for each attempt at a new marriage. Psychiatrist and author of The Secrets of Happily Married Men and The Secrets of Happily Married Women and The Secrets of Happy Families, Scott Haltzman, MD, says i … Read More

via Marriage Gems

California, Here I Come.

If you’re seeing this post, it means I did not have time to compose a longer entry for Wednesday. However, by this time, I should be basking in the SoCal sun (actually, the forecast says it’s only going to be warm, not hot).

On Thursday, July 22nd, one of my best friends will become Mrs. Hofeldt for real. I am very excited for the event (and my new outfit I picked out).

If I remember correctly, Mrs. Hofeldt uses this line in her Facebook profile: “Happiness is what happens when all your dreams come true.” – Wicked

And her relationship with her husband-to-be is nothing short of a dream come true.

Congratulations!