I haven’t left my building all day.

It was a welcome “stay in” kind of day, though. It was a “no make-up” and laundry kind of day. A catch up on all work kind of day. A do yoga at home and drink chocolate milk afterwards kind of day.

Serenity comes in many forms for me. Yesterday, it was a sunny drive down I-5 from Portland. The night before, it was dining at Pok Pok and taking in the rich flavors and the good company. Earlier in the week, it was the beautiful flight into PDX from a fun-filled girls’ weekend in Vegas.

It’s been a long couple of years for me. I have a restless soul, and my peaceful moments seem to be overshadowed by personal turmoil often times.

What keeps me going, though? It’s knowing that I’m still here for some reason. It’s that my journey is still in its infancy, and that I am supposed to do great things. I’m good now, but I’ll only get better.

For now, I’ll snuggle up under clean flannel sheets, with a bit of fall air coming through my bedside window. Maybe I’ll dream of something fantastic, something unreal. But maybe it will be reality.

And maybe, those things are actually the same.


Kicks of Silence

This weekend was so needed.

I got dressed up and went dancing one night. As I have said before, I feel alive when I can just move to music. Nothing mattered–well, except for making sure my dress didn’t ride up too far.

The next day I went to the coast with friends. We found a wonderful cafe with a funky atmosphere and amazing desserts. I had key lime pie, and like everything else on the menu, the ingredients were a local as possible and the food was handmade. It was heaven.

Back in Corvallis, we destroyed our bodies with Dorachos–nachos made with Doritos chips. They were an abomination, I swear, but oh-so-tasty. It was my idea, since I had a bag of these chips and was kind of missing Seattle. (The Cha-Cha Lounge sells Dorachos… under a different name.) I am the ultimate bachelorette, I swear.

Sunday was my day of rest, with the completion of a good deal of homework, followed by dinner with friends. Good laughs were had, as well as enchiladas.

Three of us then scampered away to a local Episcopal church for Compline service. There is something incredibly soothing about Gregorian chants, as well as the premise of “Just sit back and relax.” It feels much more spiritual and personal that way. I want to make it up to Seattle for St. Paul’s Compline services. The last time I was there must have been 2007, when we wrapped up our spring break road trip. Compline there is a totally different experience, with the freedom to lie on the floor or sit wherever one chooses. You get to lose yourself in personal silence as ancient melodies surround you.

I’m still on that personal quest for peace and resonance. This term has not been good for that. I have a lot of repair work to do still, both in personal and interpersonal terms. However, I met with an individual I consider a mentor, and he helped me process a few things, just by letting me talk.

I am in an interesting place in life. When I graduate, I will have the ability to job search wherever I please. I can cast a wide net.

And I hope in doing so, my adventure, my journey will take me to places I never dreamed about.

Peace be with you. And me.

Or... Come at me, bro.