Speak No Evil

What do you do when you have so much to say, yet your words will fall upon nothing but deaf ears?

What do you do when what should be easy and fun and light feels like a burden, like animosity, like you’re shouldering all the weight?

What do you do when you’re frustrated and invalidated, and the only feasible path seems to be the one where others walk all over you?

What do you do when you’re me?



There was a game on Saturday, UW vs. OSU. I don’t want to talk about how it ended, so instead, I’ll talk about how much fun tailgating was. There is little else more satisfying than meeting up with a friend, buying many beverages, and searching for an OSU tent full of people you don’t know. We ended up hanging out with OSU fans, UW fans, and a few neutral Seattle U. students (and some French-Canadians??!), and it was a grand ol’ time. Made some new FASA connections, too– just proves it really is a small world.

The rest of the weekend went well. Just lots of food and hanging out with friends.

Today’s been a mixed bag. On one hand, work and class went really well. On the other hand, I found out there’s been a huge mix-up with my 401(k) rollover process. Long story short, one week before my rollover paperwork arrived at the administrative offices, there was already a command put in to close my “low balance” account. I would have known this if I had gotten my mailing address at OSU early enough, but I had to have all my mail sent to my parents’ address.

Longer story short, I have to come up with over $200 to match what is being withheld for federal taxes, roll everything over somehow, and wait until tax season to get my refunds.

Now I get to deal with paying some state income tax, no state income tax, and reclaiming withholdings. I hate everything related to money right now, especially since I still have to wait about two weeks for my next paycheck.

In other news, I miss my mommy and daddy, my hometown friends, my Seattle friends, and that one I call the Super Ninja. But on the up side, I have a nice little friend network growing here in Corvallis.

More to come later.

It Isn’t All Fun and Games

I have been trying to stay positive about grad school, but since it’s Monday, let’s recap the “hilarious in hindsight” of the past few weeks.

For starters, my new hire paerwork was lost… twice! It’s affected my tuition waiver (read: I have a huge bill instead of a refund right now– booooo!), and it definitely caused me to scramble. I’ll see if it works out by this Friday, since payday should be that day. Should.

Next up– residence hall shenanigans. God bless the professionals that pursue that particular line of student affairs work. Maybe I have just grown old, but I like being in bed before 11 on weeknights and apparently, I also like being in bed by midnight on a Saturday night.

And some people like pulling fire alarms at 2AM on Saturday nights.

I woke up, groggy and wondering what that awful noise was. Then I heard the RA’s distinct voice calling, “Fire alarm! Go out the fire escape!” I proceeded to throw on a few more articles of clothing (I sleep in bitty shorts and sports bras, seriously), then almost tumbled down all the stairs because I was so disoriented. Ugh. Our hall stood out in the lawn– luckily, it was gorgeous out that night– for about 45 minutes. All this after the Super Ninja and I had exchange happy “sleep well!” texts only a few hours earlier.

It’s not difficult to forget that these challenges are still part of my future career. And it is certainly not difficult to appreciate the experiences.

What is difficult is suppressing the want to find the alarm-puller and beat him or her senseless. With a student development textbook.

After completing my first day as a grad student, though, I am feeling as if this is a good choice. We discussed in class today the issue of students’ attitudes towards college– e.g., “I am going to college so I can be financially sound” vs. “I am going to college to develop a meaningful philosophy of life”– and how perhaps being “financially sound” isn’t necessarily a desire to be flithy stinkin’ rich. Maybe it’s instead finding a good job that one can be happy in– which is, to me, a pretty meaningful philosophy.

Anyway– back to reading.