I dreamt of airplanes over O’Hare. They flew in flocks, like birds crossing the Oregon sky. They alighted upon green hillsides, the airspace too crowded for conventional landings. Each plane was gentle, careful as a butterfly on a spring petal, and the late afternoon sun glinted off their aluminum bodies.
I dreamt of bridges and tornadoes. I ran as fast as I could with no direction, the storm moving closer and closer. I looked back over my shoulder– over and over. The sky turned bluish-gray, never that eerie green seen in Tornado Alley; it eventually parted as a twister reached me. Clouds’ rotation slowed and slowed, as gold and sun triumphed over gray. Instead of dissipating, the clouds transformed into an angel, flowing robes hanging from her body– perhaps she was a goddess– and she spoke to me in the middle of a flowering field. What she said, I do not recall. I felt peaceful when I knew I should have lost my life.
I dreamt of you, coming and going just like the women of whom Prufrock sings. I snarled at you, a fox snapping at her cage, reeling against your presence. I blamed you for my state, and you stared silently, your vacant gaze indicating you still knew nothing of empathy. I remember raising my voice but never shedding one tear. Still, you feigned worry, then continued out the door to a job you would always hate. The kitchen lights– one burnt light bulb, the other flickering– barely illuminated the wall clock.
I did not dream of resolve in the chaos. Instead, I awoke with a sense of dedication. Lost loves, I will forget you all; bit by bit, only the highs and lows will remain until possibility finds its way to me.
Of whom will I dream? Who will inspire me to live life in an unaccustomed fashion? Has he frequented my most unconscious dreamscapes under moonlight’s cautious gaze? Or like the angel from the storm– will he only emerge when all is lost?
*It’s been awhile since I’ve shared any original non-bloggy/non-academic writing. This is just a short piece which was inspired by a series of dreams I had several weeks ago.